“Everyone knows it is those darn unvaccinated that are causing climate change, so I don’t know why everyone is mad at me for the carbon tax increase. They should be blaming all those unvaccinated racists and misogynists. I mean, how do we live with these people?” said Justin Trudeau.
That’s when our local Onion reporter pointed out that most Canadians are vaccinated so that can’t really be the case. Trudeau responded. “Yes, they got the first two vaccines which don’t count, and if they haven’t gotten their 16th booster they are climate change deniers, trust the science.”
That is when our Onion reporter told the Prime Minister that nothing he said made any sense. “I am a communist dictator; therefore, I have control over all of Peoplekind that is why I do not have to make any sense”, said Trudeau, repeating his statement in French.
Shortly after this interview our Onion reporter had their bank accounts frozen. They managed to get their accounts back, but the bank said all the money they held was sent to Ukraine to help protect pregnant men in the Ukraine from climate change.